Friday, July 27, 2012

School Food Fight


Daniel Brizuela
1/4/12
School Food Fight.

          It was a sunny eleven o’clock in the morning at Babe Ruth Elementary School, when the bell rang signaling the start of lunch for the entire school. In this particular day, however, lunch at this school, like everything else at this school, is anything but ordinary.
            Babe Ruth Elementary isn’t any other elementary school as it is a school filled with the craziest and most imaginative kids ever. Every day, these kids do the craziest things during each class, especially during lunch, which no other school ever does anywhere else. Whether it’s an entire circus arriving at the school, or even bringing in giant mutated ants for the science fair.

            On that day’s lunch menu, there was a lot of pasta and pizza available along with some watermelons, apple juice, and packets of ketchup. The perfect ingredients for something that will end up causing very strange and crazy things for the school, just like every other times.
            It all started out like any other school day, although it was raining a little outside and somehow a cow was in the middle of the lunchroom. A lot of students were waiting in line like they all normally would in order to get their food, when suddenly it happened.
            Someone, whose identity may never be known, threw a whole pizza pie towards the table that had the kids who were all dramatic actors. All of the dramatic actors were dressed as characters from the Star Trek franchise for a play the school was making.
            One of them was dressed a lot like Captain James T. Kirk and sitting in a chair that resembled the Enterprise’s captain’s chair. The Kirk impersonating child saw the pizza pie and jumped to the middle of the lunch table and began talking like Kirk.
            “Look out!” the kid yelled in a manner similar to Shatner’s role as Kirk. “There is! A pizza pie! Coming right at us! Look out!!!”
            The pizza pie hit the table and the cheese and sauce spread all over the table and unto the students. The drama students all turned in the direction of where the pizza pie was flown from and got out their Coke spitting phasers and fired at everyone else.
            Those who got hit by the sprayed soda got mad enough to grab trebuchets and fill them up with whatever was available. The trebuchets launched the food right back at the drama students and soon everyone in the lunch room took part in it. Even the janitor who had to clean everything up later took part in it by firing a hand cannon full of meatballs at pretty much anyone.

            Ten minutes later, and the immense food fight was still going on, with every inch of the lunch room covered in food spatter, like a really bloody war zone. The whole thing felt like a mixture of many different war films, like Saving Private Ryan, Pearl Harbor, All Quiet on the Western Front, The Longest Day, Platoon, and many other different films.
            You have kids covered head to toe in ketchup, others stuck to the floor, and some more on the ground unable to move because they were full from eating so much. When you think that the battle might finally be over, it just keeps getting messier and much crazier than before.
            Then, one kid, unknown as to which side he’s on, and not covered in food, got in the middle of the lunch room and told everyone to stop. The kid started to tell them that they should seize this pointless fighting and learn to work together as equals. All of the kids from both sides looked at each other for a few seconds and then just threw all the food at the kid in the middle, burying him in a large pile of food.

            Two minutes later the fighting was starting to end, with both sides having run out of food to throw at each other. Even after throwing plastic plates, that too was starting to run out eventually until there was nothing left.
            After both sides ran out of things to throw, both of them waved a white flag to signify that both sides have decided to give up this pointless fighting. One kid from each side walked to the middle of the lunch room and agreed to stop by shaking their hands.
            Just then the same kid who had wanted everybody to stop suddenly appeared out of nowhere carrying pies that usually are shown to throw at someone. He was about to shove the pies at the two other kids when, suddenly, a bell rang signaling the end of lunch time.
            Everyone cleaned themselves up and left the lunch room to go to their classes like nothing happened. The only one left was the kid holding the pies who just stood there for a moment and then hit himself with the pie.

End.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Full Metal Physics screenplay


Daniel Brizuela                                                                                                                                  5/2/12

Full Metal Physics screenplay.


1          INT. MILITARY ROOM- 2 P.M.                                                                                                1
FADE IN
            A WISTLE IS HEARD throughout a military base by a general in sunglasses wearing regular clothing in a room with desks and a blackboard. Four to eight young men arrive also wearing regular clothing. They stand straight next to each other starring firmly at the general. None of them have any guns but the general has a big ruler.
GENERAL
Good, you’re all here like I told you to be. Wearing what I told you.
YOUNG MEN
Yes sir!
GENERAL
You all studied what I told you?
YOUNG MEN
Yes sir!
            One of the young soldiers stepped in front.
SOLDIER #1
Sir, just out of curiosity, why did you have us each study different subjects in physics?
            The general walked to the soldier and stood face to face.
GENERAL
What’s your god darn name son?
SOLDIER #1
It’s Private Mick Junden, General Rup!
RUP
Well then, Private Junden, what did I assign you?
JUNDEN
Uh, you assigned me forces sir!
RUP
That’s right I did, you good waste of trash! Now tell me what force is.
JUNDEN (scared)
I forgot sir.
RUP
You forgot! Let me remind you then! Force is a push or pull that may change an object’s state of motion. Is that understood!
JUNDEN (scared)
Yes. It is. But-
RUP
But what!
            Another young soldier walked forward.
SOLDIER #2 (nervous)
He’s just wondering how this is useful in battle, sir!
RUP
And you are?
SOLDIER #2
Gunnery Sergeant Albert Turpes. You gave me waves, sir!
RUP
Is that so?!
TURPES
Yes, sir!
            Rup took his ruler up to the Gunny’s neck and smacked him on the back with it not so hard.
RUP
I didn’t ask for what I gave you! So tell me then, how fast does light travel in a vacuum?
TURPES
It goes three times ten to the eight meters per second. But what about my question I asked?
RUP
Why am I also teaching you physics alongside with how to fight and use guns? It’s simple, the enemy doesn’t know physics. What they don’t know will hurt them! We must take advantage of that! That’s why we have to learn about waves, forces, Hooke’s Law, momentum, and all that other stuff! It can help us. It can help you stay alive in life. Help you in anyway in life! That’s why I’m teaching you and pushing you with it so you use it one day when you need it! Is that understood you no good wastes!
YOUNG SOLDIERS
Sir, yes sir!
RUP
Now, who did I give momentum to?
            A third young soldier walked forward.
SOLDIER #3
Me sir! Private 1st Class Jack Serto!
            General Rup walked toward Serto.
RUP
Serto, Is that German?
SERTO
No, sir! I’m Polish.
RUP
Ah. I like you.
            Rup cleared his throat.
RUP
So, tell me then. What’s the equation for momentum?
SERTO
Uh, I believe it is mass times acceleration.
RUP
That’s right.
SERTO
It is? Thank you.
RUP (angrily)
Of course not you useless sack of vomit! You’re useless! Its mass times velocity! That’s probably one of the easiest questions I asked!
SERTO
Sorry, sir.
RUP
Sorry doesn’t cut it to the enemy who has an AK-47 on your face.
            General Rup blew his whistle.
RUP
Get out of my sight! All of you!
            All of the young soldiers left.
End.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

The Stalking One

video

10 facts on floor hockey


Daniel Brizuela                                                                                                                                3/28/12 10 facts on floor hockey.
1. Stick can’t be above waist if right next to a player.
2. Feet have to stay on ground in order to swing.
3. No body contact with other players.
4. No ice-hockey equipment.
5. Played in flat floor surfaces like basketball courts.
6. Sometimes used to train children to play ice-hockey.
7. The rules of floor hockey come from the rules of ice-hockey.
8. It first originated in mid-1800s Canada.
9. It became a part of the Winter Special Olympics in 1970.
10. There’s overtime if a game ends in a tie.

Friday, July 13, 2012

A Killer Talk screenplay


Daniel Brizuela                                                                                                                                  3/7/12
The Killer Talk screenplay.


1          EXT. BREAKFAST CAFE- 11 A.M.                                                                                          1
TWO suit dressed men, one with a brown tie and a suitcase and the other with a red tie and thin glasses, were walking and talking outside a breakfast cafe.
BROWN TIE
Did the boss give you a job today, Joe?
JOE
Oh yeah. It’s very messy! What about you?
BROWN TIE
Yep! But it feels too easy.
JOE
What do you mean, Harry? All you have to do is strangle to death a guy that owed the boss money. I on the other hand have to make my guy suffer so much before I kill him. What’s worse, I don’t know how I’m going to kill him.
            Joe grabbed the door to the café.
HARRY
How about cutting the guy’s toes off and then have in choke on them?
JOE
Maybe!
            Just as Joe was opening the door, Harry stopped him immediately.
HARRY
When we’re in here we’ll use code words in case someone hears us. Got it?
JOE
Which ones?
HARRY
Movies!
            They enter the café.

2          INT. BREAKFAST CAFE- CONTINUED                                                                                 2
            HARRY and JOE found a table to seat in and sat facing each other.
JOE
So, what do you have?
HARRY
How about a Batman Returns?
JOE
There’s no torture in there.
HARRY
Casablanca?
JOE
Max has my cement mixer.
HARRY
Maybe you could do a Glory?
JOE
I lost my chainsaw on the last Glory.
A few minutes after entering the café, a waitress went to their table and asked what they would like to have for breakfast.
JOE
I’ll just have coffee.
WAITRESS
What about you?
HARRY
I’ll have French toast and apple cider. Also some cream.
WAITRESS
Got it! You’re orders will be here in two minutes.
            The waitress left with the orders written down.
HARRY
So, what do you think?
JOE
I don’t know. It’s your breakfast.
HARRY
Not that. On the job!
JOE
Oh. Yeah! That’s tough.
HARRY
How about a Revenge of the Sith?
JOE
That needs to be in a jungle.
Just then Harry and Joe’s good friends Helen, who works for a different business and used to date Harry, and Slater, who was retired from the same business as Harry and Joe but occasionally takes parts in some “jobs” and is Harry’s neighbor, enter the café and sit with Joe and Harry.
HELEN
So, what’s wrong with Joe today?
JOE
He can’t figure out how to get this guy. Our boss wants him to torture him good, but he’s stumped. We’re using films as codes.
SLATER
See, that’s the problem with you guys. You let your jobs control your life. That’s why I retired early and lead a simple life.
HARRY
You come into my home and eat my food!
SLATER
You said I could.
HARRY
I said as neighbors we borrow from each other. Not mooch from each other!
JOE
Hey, hey, I’m the one with the problem here!
HELEN
You got that right.
JOE
What the heck does that mean?
HELEN
Hey at least you’re not dating someone you’re supposed to, you know.
HARRY
You mean Kevin Loody, the used car salesman who likes to head butt people? Weren’t you supposed to pull a Cars on him, two months ago?
HELEN
Yeah, so!
JOE
What if you’re boss finds out?
HELEN
Oh, Mr. Keeterman found out yesterday.
JOE, SLATER, HARRY (in unison)
And?
HELEN
He gave me a talk about his time once in Guatemala of how he once made a man eat a pound of bread, and then after that I just ignored him.
JOE
Maybe we can trade?
HELEN
Sorry, I don’t think he’s you’re type.
            In entered two uniformed police officers. Slater looked terrified.
HARRY
What’s wrong with you?
SLATER
You know my friend Rob Halamano?
HARRY
Ah, yes. Our favorite party themed serial killer nicknamed Gacy’s Brother.
HELEN
What’s wrong with him?
SLATER
He almost got caught. He was about to abduct his next victim when all of a sudden he tripped and he’s memorabilia of his victims fell to the ground. A police officer saw them and recognized the victims; next thing you know Rob kills the officer, but gets identified by his would be victim. Now he’s in my apartment until the whole thing is forgotten.
JOE
That’s a nice story. But you know what?
SLATER
What?
JOE (angry and yelling)
It’s not helping me!
HELEN
Fine, you want help. How about a Toy Story 2?
JOE
Can’t do it?
HELEN
Why?
JOE
I’m not allowed within ten feet of Canada.
HARRY
He pulled a Cavalcade near the CN Tower.
SLATER
You could do a Bambi?
JOE
Whoa. That’s like if you want to be charged of a war crime on purpose.
HARRY
You know what? How about we meet here tomorrow and hear how Joe did it with whatever he came up with? Agreed?
JOE, HELEN, SLATER (in unison)
Fine!
3          INT. BREAKFAST CAFE- THE NEXT DAY                                                                             3
            HARRY WAS sitting in the same table as the day before waiting for Helen, Slater, and Joe to arrive. The same waitress from yesterday appeared to take his order.
HARRY
The same thing as yesterday, thank you. Although, without the cream.
WAITRESS
Coming right up!
            Just as the waitress left, Helen entered with what looked like shopping bags.
HELEN
Hey!
HARRY
You go shopping just now?
HELEN
No I finally did it.
HARRY
You finally did Cars on him?
HELEN
Yup!
HARRY
What made you finally do it? Was he cheating on you? Head butt you?
HELEN
I finally got tired of him.
            In entered Joe with a scratch on his cheek and his arm in a cast.
HELEN
What happened to you?
JOE
I did it. I finally found a way to get him?
HARRY
And all that is from the job?
JOE
He was struggling.
HELEN
What you do a 1776, or maybe a Love Story?
HARRY
Don’t be silly, he obviously used Rocky III or A New Hope, right?
JOE
Neither. You see as he was struggling I was thinking of something as gruesome as The Lion King. But at the last minute I pulled a Hostel.
HELEN
You got all that from doing a Hostel?
JOE
So what?
HARRY
It’s like one of the easiest things to do and yet you got all bandaged up from it.
JOE
Did I mention I lost the kitchen knife I was using? Unless it fell out of the window during the struggle as it was in the third floor of a hotel, The Marisol.
HARRY
That’s why you had to change it?
JOE
Yeah.
            In entered Slater with a confused look.
HELEN
What’s with you?
SLATER
Rob’s dead.
HARRY
What happened? Did the cops get him?
SLATER
No. He was outside last night taking his usual night walk. I was with him making sure that no cops were around. Then we get to this nice looking hotel, called The Marisol.
HELEN
We were just talking about that hotel. That’s where Joe got his victim.
SLATER
Really, well anyway I had to stop to tie my shoes. Rob was walking slowly waiting for me to finish when all of a sudden a knife fell out of nowhere and stabbed him right in the head.
            Helen, Joe, and Harry look at each other in shocked eyes.
HARRY (in a guilty like voice)
Really!
SLATER
The next thing I know is people are screaming and the cops arrive and identify him, I got out there before they could ask me anything. I tell you I’ve seen crazy stuff but that takes the cake. Do you guys know anything about that? Joe you where there did you see anything?
JOE (in a guilty voice)
My guy was in the uh, kitchen. I pulled a Disney’s Pinocchio.
SLATER
Whoa, we got a real killer here. Well I guess it’s just one of those things that just happen I guess.
            Helen, Joe, and Harry laugh like they’re trying to hide something.


End.